Palazzo Ducale, Venice

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Palazzo Ducale, Cheryl Marie Cordeiro-Nilsson

In Piazza San Marco, near to the Ponte dei Sospiri, you’ll find the Palazzo Ducale.
Text & Photo © JE Nilsson, CM Cordeiro-Nilsson 2008

It is difficult to navigate the streets of Venice at peak season which is the summer months, and I can more than understand the disdain and even hostility of the Venetians towards visitors who leave more than their fair share of markings on the ground as visitors. More than a million individuals walked the grounds of the Palazzo Ducale alone at about the time of this visit in 2008. Continue reading “Palazzo Ducale, Venice” →

The silk scarf as accessory

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A 1960s classic way to wear the scarf on the head, as Audrey Hepburn, Jacqueline Kennedy, Grace Kelly, Queen Elizabeth II, Gina Lollobrigida etc. wore it.

I was introduced to the scarf (actually, a cotton bandanna) in my teens when I received one as a gift. I used it the most fashionable way possible then, like all my other girlfriends and that was to tie it around the ponytail. When meeting up with girlfriends, we’d say, “Turn around! Let me see!” and then it’ll either be “Wah! Pretty!” or “Oh.” meaning, it wasn’t such a rave review for the bandanna. We also wore bandannas around our necks cowboy style, a style I prefer not to don these days.

I’ve had the opportunity to collect many bandannas and scarfs of all types of materials over the years and I find the silk scarf to be one of the most versatile of pieces. The gossamer soft and sleek material allows for varied styles and uses, whether over the head, shoulders, waist or tied to a bag.
Continue reading “The silk scarf as accessory” →

Quiet? In St. Tropez, Côte d’Azur

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St. Tropez is characterised by narrow streets that lead straight to the Riviera front.
Text & Photo © JE Nilsson, CM Cordeiro-Nilsson 2008

Located on the French Riviera, the ancient town of Saint-Tropez is as beautiful in the day as it is in the night when the coastal stretch is lit in what seems like a mellow glow of romantic amber against the velvet navy of the ocean and night sky, nothing that reminds of its intriguing and turbulent history from the time of Nero and the Roman Empire.

Having somewhat been at the cross-roads of all sorts of trade and warfare, it was here in this town that was said that France had first contact with the Japanese in September of 1615, obliged to spend the time in St. Tropez due to bad weather conditions, when the Japanese were en route to Rome. Continue reading “Quiet? In St. Tropez, Côte d’Azur” →

Suede luxe to Fall

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Pedro Garcia Xaide suede boots.

One of my favourite items to autumn is a beautiful pair of suede leather boots. With current trends, suede boots are found in all sorts of variations. A soft brushed leather that comes usually from the underside of lambskin, though these days, other types of skins are used such as goat, pig, calf and deer, the open pores of this leather means that it isn’t much waterproof or stain-proof. Still, the plush feel of suede boots is attractive and its suppleness allows for a relaxed though luxurious feel for the autumn.

Above are my current favourite suede boots from Pedro Garcia. I like the ruching details, platform front and sleek stiletto heels. The lighter colour is also a relief from the darker shades to be encountered in autumn / winter seasons.
Continue reading “Suede luxe to Fall” →

Scones, a warm and easy Sunday breakfast

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Scone on a plate with (right to left) homemade red currant jam, olive butter and sun-dried tomato butter.

On some days, you just feel like the smell of warm fresh bread in the kitchen with that morning hot chocolate. This lazy and very rainy Sunday is one such day for me, so I headed out to prepare scones, which is relatively easy to make, with a high success factor and a short preparation / baking time (about 30 -45 minutes all in all).

I love the taste of scones made with half full wheat flour (atah flour) as they remind me of chapatti. I’m a fan of that north-Indian flat bread because of its versatility with food, you can have with all sorts of curries or have on its own with butter.
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Judith Leiber minaudières and evening bags

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Fluted by Judith Leiber. This gold minaudiere or evening bag is decorated with Austrian crystals. It has a detachable chain strap and push down snap closure.

What inspires me are people who believe in themselves and who work in unending devotion to build and live their dream. Such ambitions as seen in Coco Chanel, Louis Vuitton and modern inspirations such as Tyra Banks and Donald Trump, often also produce unrivaled distinction in their work.

Judith Leiber and her work is one such inspiration of mine. Born in 1921, she began her own business and line of handbags in 1963 (retired in 1998). It isn’t only her exotic designs that are eye-catching as works of art (now found in renowned museums such as the Smithsonian in Washington, the V&A in London and the Met Museum in New York City), but her acute detail to attention and quality.

Evenings bags by Judith Leiber, made in exotic skins in basic wardrobe colours. Mini Twilight, a soft frosted python bag that is both a clutch and a shoulder bag. Red Shimmer, made of crocodile with magnetic flap closure and Austrian crystal trim. Grace, a black coloured bag in crocodile.

These days, Judith Leiber the label, carries more than bags, with eyewear, fine jewellery and crystal miniatures such as pill boxes. The items are sold in exclusive boutiques around the world and in the USA, there are just about five outlets in total, in Atlanta, Las Vegas (2 locations), Orange County, and New York City.

The current exclusive stunner from Leiber is this Precious Rose, handcrafted in the USA:

This minaudiére is crafted in 18k white gold with 42.56 carats of diamonds and approximately the same amount of pink sapphires.

Judith’s husband, Gerson Leiber is also an accomplished artist and a selection of both their works can be found at The Leiber Collection, at the Leiber Museum.

Cross-Cultural Dating in Singapore

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Regardless of how westernized the Asian societies might appear today, dating someone from a different culture is dating more than just that one person, it’s an entirely different ball game.
Model: Carol Chin. Photo © by Kevin D. Cordeiro.

In this none too scientific post, my target audience is primarily western / Scandinavian males who are going to work or are working in Singapore. Since the scientific research I have been doing over the past few years has been mostly about Scandinavian top managers working in Asia, the point of view and perspective reflected will with few exceptions come from those with whom I’ve spoken. To this, I have added my own point of view as a woman and individual who has grown up in Singapore.

The dating scene in Singapore is lively
The pubs and restaurants and the social life in general encourages all kinds of human interaction in public places at all times. You are out meeting people more often than not. Most events from having breakfast at the local kopitiam (coffee-shop) to having coffee, lunch, dinner or anything in-between is a reason to meet. Technically speaking “dating” is not a problem while eventually everything around it might be.

Singapore, an easy place to blend into
A poignant surrounding factor that can cause problems when dating a girl from an Asian society is, culture. With that, comes a host of other related issues within the web of culture such as language, tradition, beliefs, religion and – food.

A spread of traditional Nonya food by the Straits Chinese. The customs and traditions of the people are as intricate and detailed as the wrappings and presentation of the food. Picture by King’s Hotel, Singapore (Khoo, 1998:130).

The culture in Singapore as well as in most of Asia is collectivistic in that sense that families are close, tightly bound, large – in some cases amounting to clans – and run by patriarchal values supported by a large, often gossipy bunch of aunties (and almost all elderly women in Singapore are called ‘aunty’) with opinions on everything and everybody.

Yet Singapore, as Asia goes, is an easier place than most other Asian societies to blend into due to its immigrant beginnings. More or less everybody came from somewhere else just a few generations ago however, well into the 20th century marriages were arranged between suitable parties, as most Asian cultures from the Indians to the Chinese, had arranged marriages as their tradition.

Today, the Singapore society at large bothers little about cross-cultural relations and interracial marriages, being currently more concerned with its falling birth-rates since 2004 (see Washington Post and the Singapore Window). Yet local to non-local relations still make interesting topics and a couple is still looked upon, observed and commented on – even by people who hardly know you.

A total stranger, when least you want to hear things
Anyone can step-up to you and start asking very personal questions, such as the woman who serves you coffee at the local kopitiam (coffee shop). One Swede observed that he from morning to morning got lower prices on his coffee obviously to soften him up for some reason. The price on his morning kopi-o (coffee, black) ran from the ang-moh (Hokkien word to mean ‘Caucasian’) price of more than $1 SGD, down to the local friends’ price of 40 cents. Flattered by the close fren price he was still unprepared for the attack. The conversation went like:

Coffee Lady: Sir, where you from?
Swede: Sweden (*one raised eyebrow*)
Coffee Lady: You how old?
Swede: Eh? Around fifty …
Coffee Lady: You got chirrun?
Swede: Eeeh?? Yes
Coffee Lady: How many?
Swede: Eeeeeh?? .. well, two …
Coffee Lady: You here for business or wat
Swede: Yes
Coffee Lady: You got your own business
Swede: Yes, in fact I do …
Coffee Lady: You earn how much?
Swede: Ehm, well yes …
Coffee Lady: You here for gerfren (girlfriend) ah?
…
After the questions had been satisfactorily answered and the coffee lady had figured out whether the Swede would be in the market for a meeting with any one granddaughter, niece, daughters of friends, third cousin’s neighbor’s friend’s daughter or some other eligible young woman that was felt was lagging behind in her family career of getting married and having children and needed a push in the right direction, the coffee price eventually went right back up again to the normal solid $ 0.80 SGD.

To the utter embarrassment of the younger generation, aunties can also have no qualms about inquiring about family relations and trying to set up meetings even in the very presence of the persons in question. They will happily talk right over your head as if you were not there. If you think of this as a most well meaning tradition based on the collective nature of the Singapore society you might get used to it and react on it in the proper way, which is to give evasive answers and a friendly smile. I think of it as having its roots in a kampong (village) tradition where everybody knew and cared about everything and everybody. So eventually you will be dating the whole family whether you like – or know – it, or not.

Sarong Party Girls (SPGs)
The collectivism leads to another aspect of cross-cultural dating, its social implications. Even if social gossip may not affect a foreigner with a possible time limit to his stay, there will be a social pressure from family, friends and perhaps even total strangers that might cause problems for the local woman.

The different Singaporean sub-cultures are different in this respect about social pressure and each will have varying degrees of open-mindedness towards foreigners in the family.

Some Swedes I have interviewed for my research were well aware of the concept of SPGs. This is a loose expression for a local woman who would consider dating a foreigner in much the same way as a western girl would i.e. with no immediate plans of getting married to him as soon as possible and not even asking to be paid to do so. In Singapore the SPG label implicates questionable moral or worse, as in bad business sense on the part of the woman, in a society where arranged marriages were the norm not more than a generation ago.

First, meet her parents. Then …
Picture by Lily Khoo, from The Straits Chinese (Khoo, 1998:94):

… meet her family, whom you will also be dating whether you know it or not. As an example, this old picture shows 4 generations of a family, gathered to celebrate the 80th birthday of the family patriarch. The scenes are surprisingly similar around for example Chinese New Year up until today. (Picture: Khoo 1998:39).

So while dating a local woman is not impossible, the foreign male should remember that he is out on uncharted territory. In Asia, you are not approaching only a person but whole a culture and a mindset that is as with all values are so set as to be invisible for those who share it while to the outsider will appear suddenly and out of nowhere as a glass wall at night.

Rather than to be discouraged, there is in fact plenty to gain in dating cross-culturally. There are new ideas and perspectives to discover and share. A key to smoother relations is to begin with understanding that it isn’t just a pretty face you are meeting.

References

  • Khoo, Joo Ee, 1998. The Straits Chinese. The Pepin Press: Amsterdam, Kuala Lumpur.

    • The wooden heel: a summer staple

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    Fall in love this summer with a pair of green tooled leather clogs
    with a hidden platform, by Gianmarco Lorenzi.

    The high heel that helps elongate the female silhouette is not without its price, as ABC News reported in 2006. And while we may know this to be true with some experiencing knee and ankle injuries, the high heel as a fashion accessory is still loved by many, helping bring out the femme fatale in us.

    The heel however, wasn’t all too sexy or “femme fatale” in its beginnings as demonstrated by this pair of 17th century Venetian Chopines by the Met Museum. Continue reading “The wooden heel: a summer staple” →

    A little bit of Southeast-Asia in Scandinavia

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    Having a morning cuppa in a light blue Terengganu, Malaysian made sarong.

    The sarong as a garment is part of Singapore’s fashion heritage, where most ethnic groups in Singapore (the Malays, the Peranakans and the Indians) have in their basic wardrobe, a form of the sarong. Although sarongs are made in China, Japan and in Africa, the batik sarong in particular is intricately linked to Southeast-Asia and it has been a part of my wardrobe since I was a little girl.

    Sarongs can be worn in a variety of ways, the most common would be to wear it tied around under the arms, as I have done in the picture above, or tied around the waist. The batik sarong is opaque in material, usually cotton but sometimes silk or linen and when tied around the waist, it can be coupled with a regular t-shirt (for home wear purposes) or with a hand-embroidered Nonya kebaya (for festive occasions).
    Continue reading “A little bit of Southeast-Asia in Scandinavia” →